How Am I feeling? Pt 1. Good Start. Bad Middle!

Last project we had to note down what we were feeling in regard to project work and I will continue this within this project as I found it very handy to jot down how I was feeling.

So far with what I have managed to do I have not been as focused as I want to be, I have a subject I love, what I am choosing to do I love and I want to explore further as part of a possible career. Life has a really bad way of getting in the way of you studying.

I have had an interruption at the beginning of the project in the way of the flu. I got over that and began my research quite happy with the subject I chose. Then 4 weeks in I began to go house hunting and found it hard to find a place because of my student status which caused a lot of stress, it made me not want to work, it made me want to quit uni, I felt so lost and unable to say that I wanted to quit because I felt embarrassed that fussy landlords had made me feel this way.

Sad kitty is sad!

I don't want to quit, not now! Onwards and upwards from this, hopefully these setbacks won't hold be back and set me far behind even though I already feel a bit left behind. I can do this!

And now I've written all the negative stuff ... here is the positive. In handy bullet point form.

• I am enjoying having a timetable and having set study periods outside of uni.
• Gathering information is getting much easier to do
• Asking fellow students/friends for advice and ideas is a less daunting experience
• Sharing my ideas no matter how weird I think they are is easier now. I have gotten over the thought of someone mocking my ideas or 'stealing' them, these thoughts are childish and stupid and I must repeat the phrase taught to us by our Year Leader Mark "Ideas are cheap."
• I feel I know what I want to do outside of uni, I feel low poly level design could be for me!

And a little more negative for the sake of it ;P

• Letting parts of life interfere with my work, I take a lot of things to heart and allow it to control me, it is hard to separate things for me and I often allow my feelings to stop me from working.
• Getting my ideas from my head, into my blog. I keep forgetting to write blog posts. And I forget that people can't see the ideas in my head and that what I put to paper/computer needs the research to back it up.

I think that's about it for this little diary blog. I will report back with how I am getting on now I have got all the negativity out of the way!